I need advice on how to deal with something like this because I'm not very good at solving this kind of stuff without getting mad. So here's the story. I live with 1 other person, who's been one of my closer friends for a couple years now. So I guess it's more of a stupid drama issue than a living issue.. but not really since I have to live there too. His phone has been shut off since his plan ran out or some shit, so yesterday I come home from work. I get off at 6, make it home by like 6:45 since I had to stop and get a new parking permit and cash my paycheck. My friend Nick from work(who is also friends with my roommate and has known him since they were little) said he was going to have a barbecue after work, and that I should stop by. So anyways I pull into our underground parking, and my roommate is walking to his car saying he's hungry. Dude is a vegetarian.. actually not really, he doesn't eat vegetables, he just doesn't like to eat meat because he will sit there and think about the dead animal or whatever and get grossed out. So I said, "well Nick is having a barbecue, I haven't eaten anything all damn day, and I'm going to that.. you can come with if you want". Right after that he just gives me a shitty tone and says "why, there's nothing I can eat there". No shit sherlock. That's why I said you can come with if you want. Anyhow, I told him Nick said not to come over until 7:30, so before hand we stopped at this pizza place for him to get a slice of cheese pizza. While we're there, he asks to use my phone to call this other person Kim. I give it to him, and while he's talking on the phone, an employee from the place is moving tables around and making so much noise I couldn't hear myself think. All I heard was my roomie telling Kim, "well we're going to be out that way anyways, so we can stop by". No big deal, whatever. After he's done eating we get back in the car and get on the expressway. Roomie asks what time it is, I look at the clock on my phone and tell him 7:40. He's driving mind you, so I think we're going over to the barbecue. We pass the 1st exit for Nick's.. then the 2nd.. so I say "so... no barbecue today or what?" I'll admit I said it pretty sarcastically, but then he just flips out and says "well I was going to go by Kim's". What the fuck nigga? I just told your ass I haven't eaten anything all day, I just watched your ass eat in front of my starving self, and I told you directly I am going to this barbecue and you offered to take your car. So he gets off the expressway and we go to the barbecue. While we're there, he leaves to go by Kim's, and comes back later to get me and we start leaving again. Now in all the time I've known my roommate, he's always asking me how to get places since he can never remember directions. So we're in the car driving and I think we're going back home. He passes the street that goes to the expressway, so I'm like "uhh this is 84th". He acts all pissy and cranks the wheel to turn and after he turns says "well I was going to get some food down the other way but I guess not". What? I can't read your mind fool, all you had to do was tell me you wanted to get food and there would have been no issue. Then fast forward to this morning he blows up on me for all that shit, and I just told him "look, I can't read your fucking mind, for one. For two, you're acting like a bitch about this shit. Three, look up passive-aggressive and then come talk to me." And that's all I've said since then. Advice?
Advice for what? You voluntarily spent a night with an asshole. You want advice to do what exactly? You sound like a broad. I'm missing the question somehow.
Sounds like all you need is communication to not get pissed off at each other. So just ask him to tell you what is up? If you're leaving somewhere you could always ask like is there anything else you want/need to do while were out? Just ask him questions to figure out whats on his mind.
Is your roommate always like this or just recently? Maybe hes under some kind of stress or is lonely and wants a girl.
Thanks cocksucker. I clearly said it was stupid drama, maybe you missed that. I want advice on how to approach this situation without escalating it to a point that my living situation is completely fucked. If I didn't live with him I'd say fuck it, but I do, so I can't. Next..
Pretty much what I was going to say. Regrettably, I've had situations where I've been put in a sour mood by one thing only to turn around act like a jerk to my good friends. It's a shameful and unfortunate human foible. If he is indeed someone you consider a friend, then I'd give him the benefit of the doubt for now and try and look at it from the above perspective. I usually try to make amends in some way, at the next opportunity. An apology, and explanation of some sort usually. My advice would be to take it in stride, give him time to cool off, treat him as the friend you know he 'really' is, and soon enough he'll probably come round to bury the hatchet. If it doesn't happen just be civil and keep to yourself.
I think this is the first post you've made that I actually agree with. Grow some fucking balls Nidex and realize your roommate is just that, your roommate. Unless you've got a mancrush on him, brush it off and move on.
I used to get into little squabbles like that with my roommate. It's nothing, just blow it off and don't worry about it and just make sure he isn't going to make a big deal out of it either. If you can both apologise with no harm done, then you'll be alright. Make sure that it's all taken care of though.
Well, I'm a little pissed off right now and a little drunk so my advice might be too much for the situation at hand. I would have flipped the fuck out on him honestly and told him to get a clue just as you basically did. But I would have been pretty pissed. Him jerking the wheel like you said would have put me over the edge especially if I was already agitated with his ass. But you have to drill into his head the fact that communication was lacking and that he needs to stop thinking so selfishly especially when other people do have minds of their owns to make up and like having a fucking game plan instead of being expected to sit quietly and let their ass make decisions for you. Fuck him dude.
LOL... yeah, I was going to ask if you guys are married? Look, honesty is always the best policy (unless you commited a heinous crime) and should be respected by both of you whether you like it or not. You guys should just OBJECTIVELY talk about any and all issues with your communication... In the end, you're two different ppl with two different perceptions of life matters.
