My wife is hurting....

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by Tacdriver, May 28, 2011.

  1. Tacdriver

    Tacdriver Junior Member

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    She just lost her older sister to Cancer and I'm not sure what to say. They've been on the outs for years but, it's starting to hit her big time now. I'm not looking for sympathy (so no "Sorry for your loss" type things) just insight on what I can possibly say to her that might bring some comfort.
  2. Chris

    Chris Raptor Jesus

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    As someone who lost their grandfather last week to cancer, the only thing I can say is to remember the good times. Love is forever. Even if they had a hiccup in their relationship, your wife should know that her sister loved her very much, and she should always remember the good times.
  3. mistawiskas

    mistawiskas kik n a and takin names

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    All you can do is just be there to support her, just let her know you're there to talk if she needs to. There's nothing that can be said to lessen the pain, only things that can be done.

    In your 50's, people start dropping all around you. people you've known for half a century. It's an integral part of life and we all get our turn.
  4. Goofus Maximus

    Goofus Maximus Too old to be this dumb!

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    Depressing but true. Life is a fatal disease. It kills everyone who has it. Aside from my Mom, the only other member of my parent's generation still alive, is my Aunt from my Dad's side of my family. I went to the funeral just yesterday for my other Aunt, who was married to my Dad's youngest brother. At 84, my Mom is beginning to head on the downward path, healthwise, as well, though she still manages to get around, has all her faculties, and can still drive. (as in: I feel safe as a passenger, and she doesn't have any problems getting her license renewed)
  5. Torx

    Torx Indigenous Nudist

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    think about this... you're dying as soon as you're born. thats mindblowing and depressing.

    but i dont know what to say either, just think about the good memories.
    this is why you shouldnt hold grudges with family or friends, you never know when they're gonna pass away. Sometimes its hard to forgive someone for their mistakes or make sense of the drama.. but one day they'll be gone and you'll regret having not made peace or having that last good conversation together.
  6. crowchaser

    crowchaser not to be taken seriously

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    death is just another part of the journey, i would let her know that you are there for her. for anything, for silence, for conversation, for support, for assistance, or for IDB!
  7. MSP

    MSP Haunting a dead forum...

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    Just be kind to her and go with the flo. When she needs a shoulder give it, but I wouldn't focus on it.
  8. mistawiskas

    mistawiskas kik n a and takin names

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    <<< new irritating avatar :wink:
    The other side of the equation is that part of growing older is learning to cope with people dying. It's not something you simply get used to ever. In addition, feeling the feelings of watching people who have been part of your whole life when they begin the decline. It's something everyone that lives long enough goes through but not something you ever are prepared for when it begins and definately not something you can change or have any form of power over. There are some of us on here that are staring at the passing of middle age and it's progression into the
    golden age (that's a bunch of shit.....calling it that) that realize just how fast time accellerates. Ie: a decade at 54 goes by as fast as a year seemed to at 24. Time passage accellerates exponentially. That's when you really realize that there is no time to waste on petty shit.
  9. GiggidyGee

    GiggidyGee Nice bum, where ya from?

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    Like everyone else is saying; just be there for her when she needs a shoulder to cry on, or if you see that she's hurting a lot but doesn't say anything just give her a big bear hug and kisses all over!
  10. Tacdriver

    Tacdriver Junior Member

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    Thanks everybody.